Many Short Game Reviews

Resident Evil 5

This game is way better than people say. Aside from Borderlands 2, and possibly Halo, it is the most fun you and a buddy can have in a couch-co-op game. Upgradable weapons, limited ammo and inventory spots, and pretty difficult enemies will provide a plethora of awesome and tense situations where the two of you will be screaming at one another and barely surviving, all the while becoming a lethal killing duo. Take away 1 point if playing alone: It's still quite good and Sheva is not as annoying as people say. Ditto for RE6.

The Last of Us

 The Last of Us represents something similar to Shadow of the Colossus: A game released late in its respective console's life that displays such prestige, confidence and creativity that it captures the imaginations of gamers worldwide, truly becoming a classic and a signature gamers game. TLoU is stunning in every way imaginable from it's heart wrenching story to its fully realized world to its brilliant mechanics as an actual game. Tonally, the adventure reminds me of Half Life 2; expertly paced, open to experimentation, and convincingly urgent in it's protagonists' struggle to survive. And yet it surpasses even that milestone by being unafraid to paint its main character as an actual person and not a blank avatar.

Deadly Premonition

 This game is so difficult to evaluate, It raises an entire argument about the validity of criticism. From a technical standpoint, it's an abomination. Clearly designed for the previous gen, from a design standpoint, it's baffling. And yet, I found myself enjoying this little game more than I had any right to because it's the weird little game that could. Whether or not the developers actually intended this game to be a serious affair of not, what they ended up with is something along the lines of Sharknado; a beautiful trainwreck so self assured and confident in its own stupidity that you actually end up buying it. The town of Greenvale is one of the most memorable places I've been in a game and I wouldn't trade it for the world.

Borderlands 2

This game is like crack. Once you, and preferably a friend, delve into the number crunching meat and bones of this game, you will find it terrifyingly difficult to find the quit option. What this game is about is finding that elusive perfect gun. The one with the power, firing rate, clip capacity and elemental damage to make your foes melt before you and your friend green with envy. And the cruel reality is that it never quite happens. Every time you find it, the enemies just get stronger and your friend finds something even better. But it's the thrill of the chase that makes this experience so compelling and addictive. It doesn't hurt that the art style is beautiful, the overall sense of humor is endearing, and the gun-play is tight.

Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time 3D

So I'm gonna go ahead and make a lot of people mad by saying that this is not the best Zelda game. Coming from a completely unbiased perspective, and having played Ocarina of Time for the first time in 2013, I can honestly say that both Wind Waker and Twilight Princess have more sophisticated art styles, less infuriating gameplay and more memorable dungeons. I fear that nostalgia has severely tainted people's perception of this game. Yes, it is the blueprint for all of the 3D Zelda games that would follow but the series evolved for the better. So many things in this game are vague with nonsensical solutions, that they had to put in a feature that tells you exactly how to do almost every task in the game. Not exactly intuitive design. Sorry.

Bioshock Infinite

From the awe inspiring long-form intro to the mind bending ending, Bioshock Infinite is one of the most cinematic compelling games ever made. It's got one of the best settings ever and features a plot so twisty, you will probably want to read up afterwards to tie up all the loose ends. In fact, this story may be a bit too ambitious for its own good. What begins as straight up steam-punk and philosophy gets somewhat muddled with sci-fi hobnobbery that feels a bit out of place. And although the characters here are fully wrought, none of them are particularly relatable. Booker pops off the generic video game character lines like he's played them all his life. But the people who created him clearly have, and thankfully, they've made a great one.

Resident Evil 6

This game is a lot of fun, make no mistake. The action feels tight and responsive, there are good mechanics in place and the set piece moments can be awe-inducing. That being said, it lacks a certain crunch that RE 4 and 5 had, and it's hard to nail down exactly why. The lack of the weapon upgrade and inventory management systems that made co-op such a blast are inexplicably absent. The game moves much faster than before, which makes everything less Dawn of the Dead and more Resident Evil The Movie. In fact, that is exactly what has happened. RE somehow has become more akin to the terrible movie franchise it spawned than its actual original identity. RE6 wasn't a huge step towards this but it marks the point where a U-turn became necessary

 Portal 2

Valve games remind me of Pixar movies. They are immensely clever, have wide appeal, feature great writing, and always come of with purpose and clarity of vision. This one is even family friendly, for god sakes, and it isn't terrible for it. Portal 2 features some of the best writing in any video game ever and is pretty much guaranteed to put a smile on your face. The small cast of disembodied voices that accompany you through your journey into puzzle-solving madness balance the brain scratching with a good chuckle in a sort of reward system that keeps you compelled to figure the next room out. I'll admit I got pretty stumped a few times but the game introduces new elements and ramps up the difficulty so smoothly, I was never truly lost.

Killzone 3

First person shooters like Killzone 3 are the mindless popcorn blockbusters to the world of video games. This game is fun enough to play but ultimately hollow and unmemorable. There a sense of the chaos of war happening around you and some pretty cool action set pieces, but any momentum and gravitas that the game picks up, it squanders with its cliche plot and characters. It's the gung-hoiest of gung-ho army tales, the type of bro-out session that will turn your stomach. Such a shame considering the quality facial animations and all-around good presentation (save for some technical issues in cut-scenes.) Anyway, it's what you would expect. No surprises here. Just a competent military shooter set on a different planet. Shooting space Nazis.

Alone In The Dark

You can't fault this game for lack of ambition- it tries to do so many things that it ends up feeling unfocused and sloppy, reaching a bit to far into other genres. You have your floaty driving sections, platforming with and camera angles, first person immersion exercises that border on the absurd. The inventory system is the most obvious example of the game's bizarre fixation with first person viewpoint. Essentially a spin off of the Resident-Evil-of-old style limited inventory slots, your weapons, tools and healing supplies are stored in your jacket pockets which you actually navigate through in first person. Crazy right? The combat is an amalgamation of combining materials to make bombs, clunky shooting, and even clunkier melee combat.

Dead Island

Dead Island is a culmination of things that need to go away in the video game industry: mindless shooting, overuse of zombies as a plot device, pointless fetch quests, total lack of any meaningful story, cliche characters, length that seems wildly disproportional to the amount of time you would actually want to play it, a disregard for presentation that is honestly insulting to the completionist gamer, extremely graphic violence with a lazy context? the list goes on. And yet, it still doesn't descend into the absolute pits of gaming hell. As hypocritical as it sounds, I guess I had a bit of fun. If this was a movie it would be Sci-Fi Channel Original.

Metal Gear Solid Peace Walker

An excellent addition to the series, adding an interesting co-op multiplayer option, a bevy of RPG elements to weigh as you amass a personal army, and a compelling story that illustrates a crucial moment in the series overall lore. The biggest problems here are a direct result of the fact that this is a PSP port. There's no getting around the fact that this is a stripped down Metal Gear experience from a technical standpoint. The environments lack the level of detail found in the main series and even the gameplay is somewhat simplified. The decision to do comic book cut-scenes actually pans out nicely, and helps the game carve out an identity. Overall, this is a more accessible, less cinematic Metal Gear that comes up just shy of essential

Limbo

Much like Journey, this is a gorgeous little game that can be completed in a couple hours. It has a haunting, sinister character to it that is part Silent Hill, part classic Expressionist film, and part nightmarish fairy tale. Without a doubt, it is one of the most visually interesting games to be released in a very long time. The gameplay unfortunately can't compete with the presentation. That being said, it is a perfectly good puzzle platformer and I was fully engaged the entire time. I just ended up wishing there was more of this eerie world do explore. Hopefully we see the influence of this game down the road. A sequel with a broadened scope would be amazing.

Batman Arkham City

I like the new Batman movies. They bring a level or real human drama to the frequently cartoonish super hero mythology. Unfortunately, this game swerves hard from that realistic and modern tone toward the classic Batman convention. Not that it is any real basis for criticism since the tried-and-true Batman has been around since the 30's, but I can't help but feel that the developers of Arkham City had an opportunity to define the dark knight on their own terms and just defaulted to bland fan-fiction story telling. They clumsily try to include EVERY Batman character under the sun, but none of them say anything but their generic threats. That being said, this is a great stealth game, a passable brawler and a gorgeous open word collectathon.

Crysis 2

I guess when I picked this up I was looking for a mindless shooter and nothing else, but I'm always up for being pleasantly surprised. Unfortunately, that was not the case here. Crysis 2 is a competent and pretty shooter that doesn't do anything in particular to separate itself from the herd. The super-suit idea has been done to death at this point and although this is a pretty impressive one, the game never actually does much to make you feel all that powerful. There is also a certain drama and tension missing from the equation and the gun-play only occasionally got my heart rate up. I did enjoy the somewhat accurate representation of a destroyed Manhattan though- possibly the best game to do this yet!

Dark Souls

Brutal, beautiful and utterly consuming, this is a Video Game in the truest sense. It demands that the player be repeatedly broken in order to overcome and progress. It explains almost nothing about the mechanics of the game and gives the player the privilege of learning on their own instead of the hand-holding that most modern games seem to find so necessary. There is a wealth of mystery to uncover and a world to explore that is among the most stunningly magnificent ever created in the medium. Part survival horror part high fantasy RPG, this is the best game of the HD console generation and one of the best of all time. The question is can you handle it?

Journey

Destined to be the shining example of elegance in this console generation. If you need a breath of fresh air from modern gaming, as I did, seek this gem out.

Silent Hill Downpour

The thing is, even though Silent Hill Downpour might not be amazing, there are practically no other games that try do do what this game does. It places you in a hostile, atmospheric setting, gives you an intriguing mystery to unravel and hands over the reigns to you. It has good pacing, entertaining game-play and is hyper-detailed. It is also, notably home to a unique and intruiging version of Silent Hill's Otherworld. Where it falters is on monster design, graphical issues (it's now been almost a decade since SH3, the series' best looking game) and once again, that certain element of disturbing bizarreness that the first 4 games had in spades, is unfortunately missing.

Review- Asura's Wrath

Well, I'm the most ardent fan of quality storytelling in video games. The approach that Asura's Wrath takes in the storytelling department is certainly… interesting. Practical, no. But interesting, sure. The game is structured like an 18 episode anime, complete with title cards for commercial breaks, opening credits on every episode, even sneak peaks at the next episode. All of this is perfectly fine and good  if you play through one episode peed day, but if you are posing through, it absolutely murders the pacing. Speaking of which, do you like watching games more than you like playing them? Yeah? Well, then this will be right up your alley. I would say the overall experience is about 40% gameplay and 60% cutscenes with frequent moments of QTE just to keep you engaged. Failing at said QTEs will not affect anything other your score at the end of the episode, so it really doesn't even feel like it matters unless you are a perfect score junkie. The gameplay itself is half beat-em-up ala God of War and half rail shooter ala Star Fox. Both of them feel inferior to their influences by a solid margin. They just aren't very polished or deep. Also, the fact that the game is so easy takes away much of the edge that these games need. I think I only failed once on my entire play through, both times on one particularly annoying boss. The pattern of the game is essentially sit through a long winded cutscene, fight for a couple minutes, watch another long cut scene, press a button when prompted to, fight again. Rinse and repeat.
So that's the negative. The positive is the production values, all around. This game really should have been a launch title for this generation of consoles, where the graphics and presentation are more likely to woo people over actual gameplay. The anime style characters are very expressive in their faces and body language. Music is powerful and varied, while retaining a traditional Asian aura. The art of the world, inspired by Hindu and Buddhist religious iconography is lush and ornate. The concept art stage of this project was literally flawless. It's too bad it got undermined by being transformed into a mediocre game. In the end, Asura's Wrath is a letdown. It ends with little ceremony, employing you to buy the DLC that apparently contains the "real" ending. This is probably the most infuriating attempt to wrangle more cash out of gamers that I have ever seen. It's fine to deny me the fancy gun or the multiplayer map pack, but give me the damn end of the game. Especially when the one you provide with the game is such garbage. Asura's Wrath is already a title where 60 dollars feels way overpriced. Now you want another 10 bucks? Forget it. And shame on you for putting me in the awkward situation of wanting to see the real ending since I already put 8 or so hours into a game, yet not wanting to have to spend more money on a game that wasn't really worth what I paid for it in the first place.
I like where you are trying to do, Cyber Connect 2. I really do. Anime is cool, this game's art and style are awesome. I genuinely wanted to love this. But your execution is all messed up. You are a video game studio, correct? If you want to make anime, then go do that. Just don't neglect gameplay as blatantly and lazily as you have here ever again. And never, ever, give your game a hack ending with the intention of releasing another one for MORE MONEY. Crimes such as these are unforgivable.

6 / 10

Review- House of The Dead: Overkill

 

My friend Paul and I have been hitting the Wii hard lately. Specifically, the wealth of arcade shooters that are available on the system. It's been a costly addiction but honestly, some of the most good, wholesome fun I've had playing video games in quite some time. Screw online multiplayer. A couple friends on the couch is a where it's at. There's a certain magic in the simple act of pointing at things to make them die as you scarf pizza and guzzle beer, all the while performing the delicate balancing act of co-operation, rationing ammunition, health and upgrades.
Of the games that we have played so far, House of The Dead Overkill is the clear winner. While it might be an entirely different experience solo (and I wouldn't recommend that you play any shooter solo, really), It's a gory, funny, kitschy, rollicking good time when you are playing with friends. You will scream at the TV and at each other and love every minute of it.
This game is essentially the closest any game has come to being an all-out homage to the film Grindhouse, even going so far as to copy and paste it's opening stripper cinematic. Throughout the game, there are the same gag tactics deployed as it the Tarantino/Rodriguez masterpiece, including over abundance if film grain, blatant over the top profanity and violence, missing reels, cheesy title cards, off the wall music selection and characters that seem ripped out of some lame 80's cop movie. All of this created an aesthetic that is engrossing, singular, and very entertaining. Unlike the previous House of the Dead games, where the presentation seemed like it was trying to be serious and failing miserably, Overkill know exactly what it is and plays to its strengths.
It's easy to make it through the entire game in one sitting, as with all House of the Dead games although this one is considerably longer than the arcade iterations. It's constructed in a more paced and thoughtful way than the others because It wasn't built with the intention of swindling quarters out of people, rather giving them an entertaining movie-length ride. And on that level, it succeeds marvelously. The only gripe is that it doesn't seem as tight, responsive or demanding as say, House of the Dead 2, a game that is tough as nails and not bashful about taking you for all your'e worth. Overkill is a hell of a ride though, and should not be missed by anyone who likes to play games on the couch with friends, perhaps the best way to digest any form of entertainment.

7.5 / 10

Review- Lollipop Chainsaw

 

Lollipop Chainsaw is the most recent release from Grasshopper Manufacture, aka Suda 51, aka "The Quentin Tarantino of Games". I'll say right now that I love Suda and all he does for gaming. His team brings a certain self-reflexive, ironic charm to every one of their games that in unmistakable. Like the films Grindhouse and Kill Bill, these games draw heavily from the well of pop-culture and come up with something that straddles the line between parody and post-modern brilliance. And while Tarantino's films' primary inspiration is other films and music, Suda adds video game references to the pile, to glorious effect. His surreal Killer 7, a nearly incomprehensible mashup of every influence the man has ever had wrapped in a utterly confounding game design, is one of the strangest shooters ever made, and a true classic. No More Heroes and Shadows of The Damned were slightly more accessible but not certainly lacking the outsider style and obscure design choices that made Suda famous.
Lollipop Chainsaw was released a mere year after Shadows of The Damned. If the new business model for Grasshopper is to drop a new title this frequently, I have to say, while I like that plan to a certain extent, I have my worries. Like Shadows, Lollipop is short and feels a little undercooked. You can breeze through this in a mere 5-10 hours. Releasing these games for 60 dollars is steep. As much of a fan as I am, I held off until the game was 30 because I KNEW what it was going to be. To an average consumer, I could see some cause for distress. That being said, take away the price factor and Lollipop Chainsaw is some of the most valuable time you can spend with a game. As a hack-n-slash, it's rewarding, addictive and propulsive. It's totally goofy, actually quite funny, and just a joy to play. Like Shadows, it's shlock. It's the kind of setup you would find in a made for TV movie or in a grindhouse theater, meaning inconsequential yet immensely entertaining junk food for the brain. Zombie, high school drama, demon slayer, Rock-n-roll and comic book tropes all mix together in a big goulash of crazy where you are genuinely interested to see what will be thrown at you next.
I talk a lot about art and aesthetic in my reviews. Probably even more than gameplay, in some cases. That's because art is what draws us to a game, and is with us the entire time. I hate spending my time in drab, uninspired digital worlds. Even if the gameplay is fantastic, if the style doesn't fetch me, I'm bored or frustrated at what could have been. Suda 51 games always shine in the presentation department despite not ever being technically impressive. Good presentation is about more than good graphics. It's about character design, level design, menu layout, music… Damn, does this game have an incredible soundtrack. Master video game musician Akira Yamaoka is present, shredding guitar along with Jimmy Urine of Mindless Self Indulgence. And if that wasn't enough, a slew of iconic cheerleader, surf, and 80's pop is peppered throughout. Hearing Toni Basil's "Hey Ricky" as the power up theme is one of the best musical moments in gaming I have ever experienced, as the song was seemingly written as a musical accompaniment to the gleeful slaughter of zombies via chainsaw, as rainbows and golden coins abound.
Other moments of glee include references to old school arcade games, mushroom trips, cheerleading minigames, excellent boss battles and cutscenes that, although shlocky, manage to elicit constant smiles and an occasional big laugh. And yet, Lollipop Chainsaw is a minor victory. It still remains to be seen whether Suda 51's masterpiece is ahead but as of now, it's still Killer 7. For all of it's wonderful quirks, Lollipop is an inconsequential piece of pop-fluff. It's the sort of thing that you enjoy the hell out of while you are in it but scarcely return to. It's a fun little game held back by less than perfect mechanics, limited scope, and the fact that it just won't be a lot of people's cup of tea. An extra bit of time in the cooker could have done this game well but really, I'm not complaining. The guys who make these games clearly have enough ideas in their heads to keep this stuff coming fast and hard. I await the next undercooked nugget of brilliance eagerly.

8 / 10

Review: Final Fantasy XIII

 

The plot of Final Fantasy makes no sense. I was trying to figure it out the whole way through, watching every cutscene, skimming through the in-game encyclopedia, reading additional material online. I'm still lost. Final Fantasy games are always a hard nut to crack, their worlds existing unto only themselves. In every iteration you are expected to digest an entire new universe of mythos, history, geography, etc. Final Fantasy XIII might just take the cake though. By using similar non-words like Fal'cie and L'cie as names for it's central ideas, it is just inviting confusion. Not necessarily bad, but pair this with the fact that the main characters are a bunch of non-comunicative anime stereotypes and, well, what you end up with is one of the most annoying and nonsensical plots ever to grace a JRPG. And that's saying something for the genre of games that is perhaps best know for it's overwrought, melodramatic, and honestly, loony teenage-angst-meets-the-sci-fi-apocalypse yarns. (Xenosaga anyone?) I don't want to let this be the only sticking point of this review though because it's not all bad.

The battle system in particular, is extremely engaging and well done. It at once, simpler and more complex than any Final Fantasy battle system to come before, and is fast, frenetic and usually satisfying. But the thing is, it had better be good because in this game, it's literally all you do. Gone are the mini-games, sidequests, optional dialogues, villages to explore, etc of previous games. In XIII, its all about battles. You travel down a series of lovely corridors, occasionally picking up loot out of a treasure chest, you run into an enemy and then you battle. Then you sit through a cutscene where these emotionally dysfunctional kids try to figure out whats going on while spouting out a dense jargon peppered with agonizing catchphrases. (Let's create our own destinies you guys!)

I do have to say that this game took me over a year to complete. I played it off and on and that may have made the plot seem even more incoherent than it actually was. I'm saying that for the sake of fairness, but honestly, theres really not anything that made me hungry to keep playing. And it really is a shame, because I was ready to love this game. I really was. I would say up until the half-way point, I was pretty into it. Many RPGs start out restrictive and branch out later into the game. This one, as an intentional design choice, keeps the player exactly where they are supposed to be at all times. Had this game been a cinematic marvel, I wouldn't have even minded. But if you are going to feed us a lousy anime story, don't make that the main course.

6.5 / 10

Review: Alone in the Dark: Inferno

Jeez. I need to stop picking up these crappy old survival horror games in the hopes of finding hidden gems. It so rarely happens. I'll tell you, it sure didn't happen with Alone in the Dark: Inferno. The Inferno edition of the game is the PS3 remake of an Xbox 360 title which was deemed unplayable upon release. I'll need to look up what exactly was changed because the game still seems pretty damn unplayable to me. Of all of the games I've played the whole way through, this one might be the only one that is not technically beatable. Due to glitches that prevent you from progressing, the game is essentially broken. Seemingly aware of this fact, the developers included a feature that allows you to skip to any park of the game like a DVD scene select menu. What. The. Fuck.
So they knew that the game didn't work and just decided to ship it anyway? On the second time it was released? It literally makes no sense. And there are soooo many glitches. Almost every step of the way through this game, I was battling a game engine that worked against me completing what the game was asking me to do. Objectives were unclear and sometimes the necessary elements to complete them did not load correctly or whatever, leading to situations where you have absolutely no idea what to do and no means to do it. The game can be stupidly difficult in this way- it will send you to the last checkpoint because of the game's poor design caused you to die. Get ready to complete the same sequences again and again until you do it the exact way the game wants you to.
What's really upsetting is that believe it or not, there was some real potential here for an awesome survival horror experience and some things work out quite nicely. You can't fault this game for lack of ambition- it tries to do so many things that it ends up feeling unfocused and sloppy, reaching a bit to far into other genres. You have your floaty driving sections, platforming with and camera angles, first person immersion exercises that border on the absurd. The inventory system is the most obvious example of the game's bizarre fixation with first person viewpoint. Essentially a spin off of the Resident-Evil-of-old style limited inventory slots, your weapons, tools and healing supplies are stored in your jacket pockets which you actually navigate through in first person. Crazy right? The combat is an amalgamation of combining materials to make bombs, clunky shooting, and even clunkier melee combat. Wait till you get a load of the melee in this game. It's bananas. While holding down a trigger, you must twirl the thumbstick in the direction you want to swing, taking into account the fact that you need a full swing radius to do any damage. Oh and you will have to solve puzzles in this way too. Good luck! There's quite a few puzzles in this game actually, almost none of which make any logical sense.
It's incredible how good one sequence will play just to be followed up by some momentum killing design errors that bring the whole experience crashing to the ground. The presentation isn't awful per se, for a game it's age (one of the first next gene titles), but when a game seems like it wasn't even tested for bugs before it ships, its hard to appreciate the good qualities. And the story certainly doesn't earn the game any addition points. It's the sort of B-Movie fare you would expect, laughably bad for the most part yet enjoyable enough to keep you sticking with until the end. With some more time in the cooker, this could have been a decent game, but as it stands, it's barely worth the 5(5!) dollars it cost at Gamestop.  4/10

Review: Dead Island

Ghaaaaa… That was miserable. This is the first time in a while I have been so fucking over a video game before completing it… and yet oddly compelled to see it through to the finish. Even though it ended totally predictably and without any twists or new gameplay elements added past the very first couple missions. This game is just idiocy. It's mindlessly running from point A to point B gunning down every thing in your way, watching an absolutely atrocious cut-scene and the rinsing and repeating. Yet, for some reason this mindlessness is palpable to a certain degree. I found this game to be a nice accompaniment to watching tv and listening to podcasts, as it is so mindless and inconsequential that you really only need to uses about 10% of your brain power to make it through. And I seriously wonder how many people actually made it through this one. The presentation quality seems to take a pretty hard dip around the halfway point, and the mission structures become even more banal and annoying than they were before. You will run back and forth between the same locations hundreds of times looking for the next item or switch that will further the absolutely asinine plot. I don't want to give anything away… actually there is nothing to give away. I don't know what happened and could not care less. There's an island, zombie outbreak, you are immune, etc. It's the same tired Zombie conventions you've seen in every movie, game or whatever since the beginning of the zombie craze, a fixation that I am personally bored shitless of. Seriously, no more zombie games for a while guys.
Theres really not much more to say about this time waster of a game. I could pick it apart piece by piece but it would be needlessly dissecting a turd. It's pretty much all turd- all the way through. Certain questions continue to bother me though: why was the premier trailer for the game so damn good? It was emotional, terrifying and seemed to signal something that would take the genre in a new direction that was laced with heartbreaking ethos. Instead the actual cast of the game is a swath of gansta rap cliches- even going so far as to have an awful zombie-themed rap over the ending credits? Why did the cutscenes, which featured atrocious texture pop-in, expressionless faces, and seemingly nonexistent lip-syncing, look worse than pretty much anything I have seen on the precious generation of consoles?! Why does the game impose any real penalty for dying, meaning that you can just go in guns blazing, die on purpose, re-spawn and just do it again until all of the enemies are dead? It totally ruined any sense of fear or dread i might have had. Why did this game last for 25 hours, padded out with a hundred pointless busy-work missions? Why do they set up the ending for a sequel? God no!
    I realize that this game is intended to be played co-operatively. And for stretches of it, I did. It made it a bit more fun, but seemed to increase the occurrence of glitches, frame-rate issues, the game freezing outright, etc. Also, if you join someone else's game, you are simply gaining experience and not progressing your own plot. For someone like me, who was simply trying to power through this mess, that did not work. So, my only option was to just wait and see if people wanted to join in on my game, which only happened 4-5 times.
    Dead Island is a culmination of things that need to go away in the video game industry: mindless shooting, overuse of zombies as a plot device, pointless fetch quests, total lack of any meaningful story, cliche characters, length that seems wildly disproportional to the amount of time you would actually want to play it, a disregard for presentation that is honestly insulting to the completionist gamer,  extremely graphic violence with a lazy context… the list goes on. And yet, it still doesn't descend into the absolute pits of gaming hell. As hypocritical as it sounds, I guess I had a bit of fun. If this was a movie it would be Sci-Fi Channel Original.  4/10